Security!

Someone stole my turkey leg
 

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Jeez, what's the big deal. Just an obese person at a costume party. Like nobody seen an obese person in the US?
 

StanScratch

My Penis Is Dancing!
"Hey, officer, a man..."
"Can't you see I'm busy?"
"But a man just..."
"Lady, I said I'm busy. I'm staking out a crime scene."
"Turkey legging out a crime scene more like it."
"What did you say, bitch?"
"Nothing. Listen, a man just..."
"Lady, I don't have time for this. This is my pre-lunch preparation break. I only get three of these this hour, and I damn well aim to enjoy it. Somebody interrupts it, they are getting my foot in their ass."
"But officer, that man over there, he..."
"Lady, I will bitch slap you with this turkey leg if you don't shut your trap! You understand?"
"OK. Sorry."
"I bet you're sorry, with creamy bar-b-que sauce."

*Lady walks back over to man.*
"Sorry, sir, but the good officer does not seem to be interested in your deep-fried buttery chocolate filled turkey legs basted in pecan pie sauce."
Officer: "Oh no you didn't!"
 

Ace Boobtoucher

Founder and Captain of the Douchepatrol
I'd like to see her try to clear a six foot fence in pursuit of a felon.
 
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